What does it take to be happy?

Maybe I need to find peace within myself to be happy?
Maybe I should be less angry and learn to let things go?
To be more appreciative of everything and everyone around me?
Be thankful for all that I've got no matter how little it is?
Be a better person first before expecting more from others?
Maybe I don't deserve to be happy?
Am I a bad person? Am I being punished?
Maybe I'm asking for too much? Expecting too much? Giving too little?
Maybe I need something to believe in?

Today, I will learn to relax. To think before I speak. To take a deep breath. To close my eyes and think of a happy place. My turn will come one day...

Sunday fun day

Went to Edgewater, NJ. They have the most amazing view of the city. We parked next to the water and just looked at the NYC skyline. I wouldn't mind moving to Edgewater. Its a beautiful neighborhood. Plus my favorite Japanese market place and food court is there!


My husband's favorite Creamyakis

Boom Boom Pow

I was being a hermit studying in bed this beautiful Saturday morning when I heard a boom. I immediately knew someone had a car accident outside. Normally I wouldn't really care or go out to look but then I remembered last night I parked my car outside on the street instead of in my carport. Since people tend to make U-turns on my block and there were a few times when idiots would accidentally hit the parked cars, I thought maybe my car was hit. So I threw on a sweatshirt and sweatpants, and went outside. My car was untouched, thank God, but I saw groups of people at the corner of the block. Turns out there were two cars involved in some sort of accident where one of the cars actually ran up on the curb into the front yard of someone's house! The car drove through a brick fence and plowed down a small tree. Fire engines, police cars and paramedics all started driving up. Reminder to self, never buy a corner property.

Diet blunders

I made these delish cupcakes tonight out of boredom. I really should keep myself more busy. I always end up making all this yummy food and not eating them. I have this passion for cooking and playing with recipes. Not good when I'm trying to diet.

15 day colon cleanse

I'm taking these colon cleanse pills for the first time today. Two in the morning, two in the evening. Its supposed to clean and speed up my sluggish digestive system. They also claim it can help you lose weight and flatten your stomach. I took two at 9am. 8 hours later still no sign of uh... any movements. What's surprising is that I didn't know a person is supposed to have 2-3 bowel movements a day. That's a hell lot of time being spent on the bowl!

What to expect while on the pills:

Today's breakfast

1 - Cream of wheat made with Silk soy milk and a hint of sugar

1 - Orange whipped yogurt

1 - Banana

Just realized the Cream of wheat has to be eaten while its hot or else it turns into Playdoh.

Diet blunders

There's always good stuff like this around... now do you understand why its hard for me to diet?

Chocolate covered strawberries from Borgata

The start of a new me

Today, I will start taking care of my body. Now that the weekend has come and gone, I am going to try eating healthier and be more active. My goal is to feel and look better by the end of June. Why June? Well, that is when we plan to go on vacation. I have about two months. I better get it poppin'.

So how did I get here? A few reasons and I won't make any excuses... First, being too comfortable in a relationship can really make a person lazy. All you want to do is spend time together doing absolutely nothing as long as you're in each other's presence. Second, going back to college is rough especially since I have to wake up at 6am every morning and study every minute of the day. There's barely any time to plan meals or go to the gym. Most of the time I'm looking for a quick fix in between classes, grabbing pizza, sandwiches or burgers in the cafeteria. When I get home after a long day of classes, the last thing I want to do is go workout.

I remember there was a time when I used to go to the gym 5-6 times a week for 2 hours a day, practically lived there! I went as crazy as to doing 2 spin classes back to back. I was also a very strict eater cutting out all fast food, snacks, junk food and soda. Not that being strict was bad, but I surely wasn't living life. So this time around, I'm going to do things in moderation. Since its spring break this week, I am going to slowly get back into the gym (starting tomorrow perhaps?). The first couple of days won't be easy but I'm ready for the lifestyle change.

Today's activitiy
So how did I do today? Well I worked all day, couldn't really implement much of my "get healthy plan" (I know I know, sounds like an excuse).
Breakfast - I had a wheat bagel with egg whites, ham and tomatoes
Lunch - Skipped it because I was too busy (sigh I know that's bad) and snacked on about 4 pieces of chocolate truffles (it was the stress, don't shoot me!)
Dinner - I had a healthy portion of mom's home cooked meal
Snack/dessert - One white chocolate covered strawberry

Goal for tomorrow
To cut out the chocolate, eat a sensible lunch and squeeze in a workout. Going out with bff tomorrow, hope I won't run into a detour!

Atlantic City boardwalk on Easter Sunday

The Borgata

My cousin from Florida came to visit for the weekend so most of the family (12 of us) are spending a night at The Borgata with him hanging out. Fun times.

I was playing slots in front of the MIXX nightclub entrance. Mostly people watching, I like doing that and secretly criticize them in my head. So it brought back some great memories of when I went to the two NKOTB concerts at the Borgata back in Sept 08' and Nov 08'. Don't forget about the expensive after parties at MIXX in which we had to get table service in order to guarantee entry into the club. Did I mention we didn't even get to meet the guys? The only thing I got to do was hold Donnie's hand for a brief second as he walked by on his way out. *gasp*

Happy Easter!

My bestfriend, her 3 year old daughter and I stopped by the pet shop yesterday in the mall. Couldn't resist taking pictures of these cute bunnies. I sent them to hubby and he said, "Oh no, you're going to come home with one". He knows me too well... I almost did go home with one but I resisted. The word "resist" is usually not in my vocabulary.


I especially loved this little tan colored one.


What a cutie!